Wednesday, November 5, 2008

Who is Tova Darling?

I've had a few requests lately to see my old blog, requests to see pictures of me, and requests for my autograph (ok, I made that last one up.) As much as I'd love to show you all my old blog (no, seriously, I'm obsessed with people reading what I've written. It's a sickness), I can't on the off-chance that one of you is my mother-in-law in disguise. (She's crafty.) But to appease the masses, I'm going to give you all a bit more info about me.

As this blog is anonymous, you've probably guessed by now that my name is not actually Tova Darling. It's nothing like Tova Darling - not the same initials, not the same number of letters, and it doesn't rhyme. (Although Nova Farling would be an interesting name.) Also, Tova is a Jewish name (or possibly Swedish, according to one website), but I am neither Jewish nor Swedish.

A few years ago, I decided that if I ever needed a fake name for anything, my fake name would be Tova Darling. (Ok, so the chances of me ever needing a fake name are slim, but if you keep in mind that I'm the same girl who is constantly performing for the imaginary cameras on her own fake reality show, it really doesn't seem that odd.) Having never actually encountered a real life situation that required a fake name, I was feeling a little blue about having such a great pseudonym and never using it; then I needed to delete my public blog and create a secret one, and - hello, silver lining! - I already had a fake name for my blog!

Now, onto more pressing issues. What do I look like? When Mr. Darling and I first started dating, he told me repeatedly that I looked like Christina Aguilera (in one of her classy phases, not when she had dreadlocks and weird makeup), which is interesting, because I'm not blond, and also I look nothing like her.
Later, Mr. Darling found out that he needed glasses, so let's not put too much stock into that.

A few people have told me that in my wedding pictures, I look like Audrey Hepburn, but I have dark hair which I was wearing up, so it's possible that the resemblance ends there.

In order to give you a more accurate description of me, I obviously turned to the internet, which knows all and tells all. I ran several pictures of me through face recognition software on MyHeritage and the following matches came up consistently with all of my pictures:

Angelina Jolie

Ashley Judd

Katherine Heigl

and Katie Holmes

If you think that I actually look like any of these women, you'd be very disappointed if you saw me in real life. I mean, I'm not unattractive, and my husband, my family and my friends think I'm hot, but they're somewhat biased. The similarity between some of these women and me is that I have dark hair, full-ish lips, arched eyebrows, big-ish eyes, and a heart/ovaly shaped face, I suppose.

(Interesting side note: my mom always tells people that I looked like Shirley Temple when I was little, so out of curiosity, I ran a few pictures of myself as a toddler and young child through the match thing-y, and Shirley Temple came up as the first match every time. Looks like mom was right!)

Now, for comparison purposes, I entered this picture of Nana Zibbs into the website:

and one of the matches was Gillian Anderson (I'm not joking):

So, you all may decide for yourselves how accurate this website is. (In fairness to the matching software, Gillian Anderson was eighth on the list. First on the list was Norman Mailer.)

(Is it just me, or can you actually see the resemblence with that one?)

I suggest that you all go to immediately and see who you look like. It's really fun. Then tell me who you look like! (It said that Mr. Darling looked like Brian from the Backstreet Boys, which he has been told repeatedly by countless people since like, the day the Backstreet Boys became popular. So, if you really look like a celebrity, it's fun to see how accurate it can be.)

And now for other exciting news... Look! The fabulous and amazing Piece o' Coconut Cake gave me these awards!

I love, love, love them! Thank you!

Now go find your celebrity twins!


Piece o' Coconut Cake said...

You figured it out! To add on your right column, add a Configure HTML/JavaScript button and cut and paste them there. Let me know if you need anything else!

Dr Zibbs said...

Once I saw the pictures of all of those ladies I noticed the thin arched eyebrows. See. I'm good. As for the Nana Zibbs, that it an excellent match!

pj said...

i should have put more thought into my pseudonym. geez, i could have been dr. pj or even pj darling. i sure have some work to do.

Poetica said...

hee hee thats funny how the old lady pic gave a resemblence of no one enar her actual look. You are a great write too by the way!

LYDIA said...

Tova! I knew you would be hot! FYI, My secret girl crush has been Angelina Jolie for 10 years. I am going to do the face recognition thingie.

MelO said...

oooooh la la!! Check you out!

Great idea! I agree that although this tool is mostly flattering, it's kind... weird. LIke, not totally offbase, but I would have never thought they'd say these were lookalikes for me:

* Hayden Panettiere
* Naomi Watts
* Michelle Williams
* Halle Berry (really. huh.)

Fancy Schmancy said...

Now that you mention it, I see the resemblance between all them, although I think that picture of Katie is pre-nose job.

arty said...

Hi Tova, just passing through to thank you for your comment.You've a very interesting blog and would love to read it when I can..

Cora said...

Tova, you must be a knock out!! I tried that celebrity thing and I was less impressed than you were. In fact now I'm bitter. It told me I look like Nana Mouskouri, Shirli Appleby, Gary Oldman (what?!), James Spader (huh?!), and (disgruntled sigh) Larry King (WTF?!). Yep, LARRY KING!!!! I'd never say I was the prettiest lass in the world (but I get told all the time that I'm "cute", I swear!), but c'mon - Larry King?! - them's fighting words!!!! Maybe I should try a new photo.

Laura said...

Congrats Tova my darling on your award. Wunderful! I guess I am a cross between Tiffany Amber Thiessen and Courtney Cox. It's the brunette and light eyes thing.

Cora said...

Okay, Tova, so I tried the celebrity thing again: this time without my glasses, with my hair fluffed, and with my lip gloss on, and - whew! - I'm no longer Larry King's twin. Happy-happy-joy-joy! I'm feeling SOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO much better now, cuz now I supposedly look like Hilary Swank, Kimberly Stewart, Krista Allen, Kelly Preston, Evangeline Lilly, Holly Hunter, and Vanessa Marcil1 YES! Not bad! I'm happy! Very much!! So, FYI, DON'T wear glasses on the celebrity thingy. That's my good advice for the day. :-)

Candy's daily Dandy said...

The Tova Darling in my mind has dark hair and looks kinda like Katie Holmes. No kidding. Not bad huh? Great post. You kicked off a celeb-look-alike revolution!

Mrs.D said...

I love that you are all secret!! I sort of wish I were totally secret, but I got all excited when I began blogging and told a few people, so I cannot be sure who really reads me now. So I am careful on what I say. I love what I have read of yours so far! I'll be back!

Glamorous Life of a House Wife said...

HA! Girl, I loooove that site. It cracks me up. I am now SO interested in seeing your face!

Hannah Noel said...

Another reason I hate that I didn't get to vote, is now if people find out I didn't vote, they'll say the ole' "if you didn't vote then you can't complain!"

Wow you have quite the list of A-listers who you look like. way to go. I'd kill for someone, even a computer, to tell me that I look like Angelina Jolie.
I'm curious as to why you had to become an anonymous blogger. Did you kill someone? Are you under the witness protection program? Are you living a double-life, like Hannah Montana?

I'll probably figure it out by reading more of your blog. ;)

Tova Darling said...

Cora - I have seen pictures of you, and you are completely, completely adorable! You've discovered the fatal flaw with the face-matching thing - since it's only looking for similar features, it sometimes gets confused between features and accessories. The first picture of Mr. Darling that I used to match was of him wearing a hat, and his celebrity matches were just a bunch of pictures of various celebrities in hats. Young, old, male, female... if they were in a hat, the computer thought they looked like Mr. Darling.

Believe me - you look NOTHING like Larry King!!

curryegg said...

Ahhww... So tricky of you.. haha... anonymous blog.

THank for joining I'm A Blogger group in FB. Nice to meet you.. :)

Legal Diva said...

Thanks for your comment yesterday, even though I didn't have much to say! I try to keep my blog pretty anonymous for the same reasons- I don't want people to take things the wrong way and I don't want to self-censor things just in case.

My mom also said I looked like Shirley Temple as a kid- and oddly enough she comes up on my list near the top, and when I used a picture of me as a child she was #1. HHHmmmmm.... maybe we are related.... shirley temple, anonymous blogs.... mere coincidences? :)

ÄsK AliCë said...

I've been told I look like Jenny McCarthy by a few different people. When I wear my hair curly I get the SJP reference but I think that's mostly because I have an oval face and curly hair. THe Face-Doubles thingy says Lauren Conrad too!

Cora said...

Yes, the glasses were a PROBLEM. Accessories are a no-no on that site, absolutely! Funny about Mr D's hat too. Hee hee. :-)

In my opinion, we don't devote nearly enough scientific research to finding a cure for jerks. ~ Calvin & Hobbes