Friday, January 9, 2009

And then I lost my phone...

As you all know, I'm kind of amazing at certain things. (Pole dancing, making lists, being awkward, etc.)

But there is one skill I have that is so spectacular, it's very nearly a super power.

I am phenomenal at losing things.

On Wednesday, in less than twenty minutes, I lost my phone so thoroughly that Mr. Darling and I searched for two hours and still could not find it. Not impressed? What if I told you that I lost it in my own home, and that I can narrow it down to the four rooms where it has to be? That's right, ladies and gentlemen. In just over 15 minutes, while I was getting ready to go out with Mr. Darling for a pre-interview dinner, I lost my phone in my house, and I can NOT find it. We called it and listened for it, but we heard nothing. (I think it's on vibrate, but still!) Then, I turned off all of the lights in the house and called it repeatedly from Mr. D's phone to see if I could see the light. Nothing! (Although I did find the dining room table... with my hip... really hard.)

I looked everywhere (including, but not limited to, under the couch cushions; in all of the trash cans; in my laundry hamper; in, on, under and behind every piece of furniture in our home; in the washing machine and dryer; in the freezer and the refrigerator; in the dishwasher; all through my closet; in the bathtub; in the cats' litterboxes; in every drawer in my dresser; in every purse I own [even the ones I haven't used in months or years]; and in the pockets of all of my coats and pants.) EVERYWHERE. Keep in mind that it was less than 20 minutes from the last time I definitely had my phone until I noticed it was gone. In that time, I did not leave my home or stumble into any black holes. But it is GONE. During my hunt I found $11 and a shoe I was missing, but not the phone. At this point, the only plausible explanations for my phone's disappearance are, A - It ran away from home, or B - My cats destroyed it in a fit of rage and jealousy.

So, um, if you should happen to see a cute little phone hitchhiking along the highway somewhere, please tell it I miss it and that all will be forgiven if it will just come home.

32 comments:

Emily said...

Great blog! A writing degree, huh? I've got an English degree and a Masters in Literacy. What do you do with that but teach?
Thanks for the comment! And I'm always glad to have another blog to read!

Tova Darling said...

Emily - Oh yes, a writing degree. I started out as English and then switched to writing (still part of the English department, of course). My family still told everyone I was an English major. The one day, I was having dinner with my family and some friends, and someone asked what my major was. I said writing, and my brother burst out with, "Writing?? That's not even a real major!"

It's always nice to feel like people respect your education... or so I've heard.

Fabulously Broke said...

I'm sure you tried calling the cute little troublemaker?

Fabulously Broke in the City
Just a girl trying to find a balance between being a Shopaholic and a Saver...

steph anne said...

That totally sucks losing your phone. I'll keep an eye out if your phone comes to Arizona. ;)

I accidentally washed my husband's phone a few months ago. :x oops!

Tova Darling said...

Fabulously Broke - Sigh. Oh yes, many times. That didn't help. I think it's on vibrate, but still you'd think we would have heard it!

Cora said...

I did the same thing with a credit card once. My FIRST credit card - which I was soooooo paranoid about losing out in public that I would keep my hand on it in my purse just in case! I was sitting on my living room floor, filing papers and I took the credit card out of my purse to double check the expiration date and I set it down beside me. 5 minutes later it was gone. Completely gone. I went through the entire file cabinet and everything. I never found it either. NEVER. I assume we had a ghost living with us in that apartment. A friendly ghost though, as it never charged anything on my card. *whew* :-)

Tova Darling said...

Steph - Uh oh! I hope he wasn't too mad.

Tova Darling said...

Cora - You NEVER found it? How weird. I'm afraid that will happen with my phone, too. :( Maybe your ghost moved to my house.

Deutlich said...

I freakin' hate when I lose things. Especially my keys.

Chloie said...

I can totally relate! I'm so good at losing things, especially my keys, that my fiance decided to buy me a key finder.

Janet said...

(Although I did find the dining room table... with my hip... really hard.)


That was by far my favorite line of the entire blog. HILARIOUS, once again. :)

Tova Darling said...

Deulitch - the only time I ever lose my keys is when my husband borrows them and forgets to put them back in my purse. Of course, now that I've said that, I'll probably lose my keys.

Chloie - Oo, I should definitely get a key finder and attach it to my next cell phone.

Janet - Thanks!!

A. said...

Oh man! I hate losing things! It drives me nuts!
Freakishly unlikely places it might be hiding:

Down the toilet. Have any babies who like to flush things down the toilet around?

Inside sock in sock drawer. Perhaps some laundry folding gone wrong?

Out flying. Perhaps one of those evil birds from the Windex commercial (they live in my backyard & torments my dog for fun) flew in, grabbed it, and flew out (and is currently using up all your minutes calling China)?

I hope you find it.

Dr Zibbs said...

God damn it I want to see that pole dancing! Maybe someday.

AngieS said...

When you find it, let us know where it was.....

Autumn Joy said...

I got ya beat :p
I lost my phone (same amount of time and also in my home) but I kinda lost it on purpose. I KNOW its in this house SOMEWHERE. But Mr. Joy and I got in a fight, and I HID my phone so that he couldnt call his mother to tell her about the fight...I hid it so well that it has been THREE WEEKS and we still cant find it. Lol.
That'll teach me to hide things again though. :)
PS the word verification for this comment is priceless and has wonderful timing its: Misses
hahaha

Julia@SometimesLucid said...

I've done that before and felt like I was losing my mind! Now I will just think of it as blog fodder.

wendy said...

This is so very funny...but only because I have been there. I *hate* when I lose things! It DRIVES ME BATTY!

I do hope you find it soon!

catherinette said...

Hey, don't stress. It'll totally turn up...the day that you buy the replacement phone. :)

Sassy Britches said...

Pocket of hoodie (which I have a sneaking suspicion you don't wear!), drawers in kitchen and bathroom, table or key holder next to front door (obvious but most times we never USE it for what it's for, and the one time we DO...). Good luck! :)

Cheryl said...

There are sometimes huge holes in the lining of my purses, and the things I've lost sometimes fall in there.

Laura said...

I would go crazy if I lost my phone and all those numbers I can never seem to memorize anymore.

Good Luck!

Morgan the Muse said...

i do not know where you live, but if you live somewhere where you have a furnace or something, could it have fallen down in register? If like, by some freak accident, the register was big enough for the phone to fall through. I guess, it could have been a very small phone, and the people who designed those vents were not thinking of the pace of technology. Hmm... that is weird. My best friend's other best friend had this happen to a goldfish, Lassie.

MuseSwings said...

I hate losing things - especially my phone. Usually I find it in the car - on, under or next to the seat. I'll check my car and see if your's is there...I'll be right back.

That damn expat said...

Did you find it yet? My husband loses his phone on a daily basis. Once we found it in the oven. I don't even want to know how it got there.

Dingo said...

Don't you hate when you lose something and people say, "where's the last place you put it?" Duh! If I knew that, it wouldn't be lost now, would it?

Rice Candy said...

Interesting blog. And you can tell that you have great writing skills.

Megan said...

Oh gosh! I'd be going insane! I sure hope you've found it by now!

Emma said...

I sware! sometimes they grow feet and run off! they just get sick of being used!!!

ÄsK AliCë said...

I lose my phone constantly! If it's not my phone it's my wallet, ID, keys etc. etc. So annoying!

Hopefully you find it!

jeromine said...

Hi Nice Blog .A phone time card that tracks both direct labor and indirect labor activity, including the employee, activity, machine, part, operation, project, date, time, and hours. This module is fully integrated with the Timeclock screens provided by Time and Attendance System

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