Tuesday, March 10, 2009

Tova's Totally Awkward Tuesdays

Hopefully, this shows up, as I've been having weird problems with Blogger. Is my computer possessed? Am I crazy? Stay tuned to find out!

Anyway, today is Tuesday, which means that it's time for us all to take a few moments to revel in our own awkwardness. I share an awkward story on my blog, then you share an awkward story on your blog, then you link below and indulge in the awkwardness of all of the other fabulous bloggers who have participated.

As everybody knows, meeting the family of your significant other is generally a very awkward experience. (For example, when I first met the good ex's extended family, they asked me whether I folded or bunched my toilet paper when I wiped. True story.) The first time I met Mr. Darling's family was no exception to this awkward rule.

When Mr. Darling and I first started dating, we lived 1,000 miles apart, so I didn't meet his family until we'd been dating for several months. The summer after we started dating, I bought a plane ticket and flew up to spend a week with Mr. Darling and his family. Their annual picnic/family get-together was going to be held while I was there, so I was going to meet everyone all at once. Needless to say, I was a little nervous.

Early in our relationship, one thing about me that amazed Mr. Darling was my eating ability. I can eat a lot. Over the course of the day/week, my total calorie consumption balances out to be pretty normal, but if I'm faced with a type of food that I really like, I can pack it away faster than someone who is twice my size. I'm 5'6" and my weight hovers around 120, but even though Mr. Darling has five inches and about 60 pounds on me, I've been known to eat double what he eats if we're having a meal that I really like. I have a pretty high metabolism, apparently, and so when we were dating, Mr. D was fascinated by the fact that I could out-eat him and not gain a pound. (He's less fascinated and more concerned by it ever since we found out that I have high cholesterol, so now he encourages me to eat healthy food and only eat junk in moderation.)

So, we were at this family gathering where I was meeting everyone - parents, cousins, grandparents, aunts and uncles - all at once, and I was already feeling a little nervous and awkward. We were all sitting around a large table, and Mr. Darling's aunt was serving the food, and after she put some on my plate, she asked me if it was enough or if I'd like some more. Before I could say anything, Mr. Darling spoke up and said, "Oh, give her more. Tova eats a ton. She eats more than I do! Seriously, you should see her eat!"

...

In Mr. Darling's defense, I know that he did not say it to intentionally embarrass me, but I was quite embarrassed just the same. There were quite a few joking comments made by his relatives about me eating, and everyone kept offering me seconds of everything. Having just been outed as a big eater to all of these strangers, I was too embarrassed to take seconds of anything, and I ate as little as possible without seeming rude or anorexic. Hopefully, they've all forgotten that the first time they met me, they learned that I was a glutton. I, on the other hand, will never be able to forget it.

So what's your awkward story? Share it on your blog, then link below! Or, if my blog isn't working, just think your awkward story to yourself and then giggle quietly. Either way.

15 comments:

The Gnu said...

yes! i'm first. i also added i with the wrong name. wilwarin, is actually The Gnu.
umm, in my excitement i forgot to read your post.
back in a minute...

The Gnu said...

o no, that's terrible. you should tease him about the pansy amount he eats!
love the Gnu

p.s. hehe Raf, i beat you! finally!

raf said...

Tova:If you were slim, the women must have envy you..

The gnu: yes, you've beat me, but just until the end of this month, then Europe will change the hour, and I will beat you again!!!

Sassy Britches said...

Oooooo, ouch. Aren't things like that always harder to live down in your own head than they are for everyone else involved?

Adriana said...

Guys are weird about the things they are most proud of you for or are impressed by. Reminds me of the coneheads and how impressed he was.

Former Fat Chick said...

My HUb told his Mom "she can pick stuff up with her toes...just like a monkey, she says she can even feed herself if she had no hands!"

Yes, this was all true (don't ask why) but WTF!? She just starred at me, never said a word.

SkylersDad said...

All of my wife's family was amazed at the sound when I blow my nose. It is something like a jet taking off or a loud foghorn, pretty impressive!

Joanie said...

My first date with my ex-husband, I out drank him! He had 8 vodka and tonics and I had 9 gin and tonics! Whew! I can't do that now!

Moi said...

it is so nerve racking to meet a significant others familt. My hubby and I have been married for a year and together for 4 years and I still get nervous around his family!

Ron Centeno said...

Tova for a 5'6" 120lb glutton, I'd say you're very sexy girl!

Jen - The Secret Keeper said...

My current bfs parents insisted on calling me the wrong name the first 7 times we met - if this isn't going to make someone feel insecure I have no idea what would!! x

Gwen B. (aka skinny bitch) said...

hahaha I think everyone has had their fair share of family fuck up with the bf, husband, ex or whatever! That one doesn't seem too bad, compared to the shit I have suffered through, but I can understand your turmoil. I have a few small one like that, where only I think it is a big deal.

Jules said...

Great way to kick off the extended family tour!

Ryan Ashley Scott said...

Leave it to a man to out you for something like eating! :) I can just imagine all the stares and side-ways glances to watch you feed your face. Awkward!

Fabulously Broke said...

I am the exact same way, but I never get embarrassed about it.

People just marvel at how much I put away and I'm like: YEAH! DAMN PROUD OF IT!

In my opinion, we don't devote nearly enough scientific research to finding a cure for jerks. ~ Calvin & Hobbes