Monday, April 6, 2009

Hey baby, do your feet hurt?

'Cause you've been running through my mind all day.

Recently, Elle, Holly and I were out at popular bar, and some guys came up and started talking to us. One of them said that his girlfriend of eight years had just broken up with him, and he wanted to know how to get back into the dating game. He asked us, "What pickup lines are best to use if you want to start talking to a girl?" and we all said, "None. Do not use pickup lines in real life. They always come off as either cheesy or creepy. If you want to start talking to a girl, come up, say 'Hi, my name is ___,' and go from there." (And by the way, yes, we all realized immediately that his "My girlfriend just broke up with me and I want advice on getting back into the dating game," routine was his version of a pickup line. But at least he didn't say, "Can I have a quarter? I told my mom I'd call her when I met the girl of my dreams." Because let's be honest, nobody uses pay phones anymore, and they definitely cost more than a quarter.)

So I want to know - what is the worst pickup line anyone has ever used on you OR that you've ever used? Come on, share! I'll start.

The most ridiculous, awful, cheesy pickup line that was ever used on me in real life was this (and I swear to you that I'm not making this up):

I was working at the grocery store back in my high school days, and it was a week or so before the presidential election, and this customer came up to me and began to discuss the election, purely so he could say...

"If you were the president, you'd be Babe-raham Lincoln."

Ok, it's your turn! Share the worst pickup line that anyone's ever used on you or that you've ever used.

Also, tomorrow is Tova's Totally Awkward Tuesday, so stop by tomorrow and be awkward. I'll be sharing an awkward story that actually happened to me last Tuesday. Apparently Tuesdays are just an awkward time for me.

12 comments:

Girl On A Journey said...

Are you from Olympus cuz youre a goddess...yes I know - simply horrible. I was embarrassed more for myself than for him

SkylersDad said...

You with all those curves and me with no brakes...

Yeah, I was drunk...

Ryan Ashley Scott said...

I don't have much experience w/ pick-up lines, since I got married at 19, but once a guy called me and said, "So my friend thinks your hot... he was all like, man, why don't you get with that?" You know, because I'd love to "get with" a guy who calls me "that" just because his friend says to. Jerk.

Always a Bridesmaid said...

Ahh haa haa!! I've blogged about this before too! Here are some doozies:
http://27dressesincleveland.blogspot.com/search/label/pick-up%20lines

Former Fat Chick said...

I got this one about 6 months ago at a bar, while my HUBS was smoking outside with his buds. We are 3 VERY married hot chicks- 2 guys walk up and ask if we will "Settle" their argument- "The girl one is dating wants to let the dog sleep in the bed, even when they have sex" IS that a deal breaker? I blurt out-OMG, I saw that show on MTV too! THe pick up artist! They walked away. Maybe they thought we were too old to watch MTV and looked to young to have kids watching MTV...well, what they didn't know if that I had my kids when I was in freaking Pre-school!

Former Fat Chick said...

Oh, skylers Dad, I got that one alot in Spanish- Tu con tantas curvas peligrosas y yo sin frenos...ja-ja

Call Me Cate said...

I guess I should consider myself lucky that most times guys hit on me they don't use cheesy lines. I'm sure my husband would agree...

pj said...

Ok never used this just can't forget it... Hey baby are you good at math? Yes. Ok let's add a bed subtract our clothes divide your legs and multiply. Sorry.

MY said...

Doesn't really qualify as a pick-up line, but it qualifies me as a dweeb.

When my fiance first asked me out on a date, he suggested that we go to an Ethiopian restaurant. Frankly, I thought he was kidding. We lived in Pittsburgh and I had never heard of any Ethiopian restaurant there. (Little did I know...)
So I gave him the old Billy Crystal line from "When Harry Met Sally..."

"That'll be great. We can order two empty plates and then leave."

Anniebanannie said...

This is too funny!

I had this single guy come up to me the other day, totally on the prowl, and say, "Hi, I'm ____, I think we've met before?"

Um no, disgusto. NEVER had I seen this dude before and I made it blatantly obvious.

No game. whatsoever.

Fancy Schmancy said...

2 of the best/worst pick up lines ever: That red blazer looks great on you! Do you know what would look any better on you? Me. Also, You look like you have a little Irish in you. Would you like a little more?

WELCOME TO MY WORLD said...

A guy told me once, "Can I have your number, I lost mine." He was kinda joking but not. Oh yea and my initials are E Z, so a customer at work once said, "So I hear your EZ?" I gave him the meanest look. Some people are so annoying!

Someone posted a link to your blog on a another blog because they were asked to post their favorite blog. That person now follows my blog so I thought I'd check out their favorite. :)

In my opinion, we don't devote nearly enough scientific research to finding a cure for jerks. ~ Calvin & Hobbes