Friday, May 8, 2009

Mensa material?

Elle is trying to convince me that she and I should join Mensa together. I'm a bit concerned that the whole group is full of weird, pretentious people who like to talk about being smart. (If you're a member, don't be offended - just tell me if I'm wrong! I don't know if anyone I know is in Mensa. Maybe some of my friends are secretly members and never told me for fear of seeming pretentious.)

Anyway, it costs money to take the Mensa test, and I knew that I'd taken an IQ test in elementary school, and your scores are good forever (apparently the assumption is that I didn't become less intelligent since third grade), so I decided to try to find my old IQ test score rather then pay to take the test. I was in a gifted program in elementary school, and I know my scores were good, but apparently they won't let you join Mensa just because you swear that your elementary school guidance counselor said you were smart. Who knew?

I rummaged through a filing cabinet full of random childhood crap, and in my search, I found out that they test children for some pretty ridiculous things. For example, I found my Physical Education Screening from kindergarten: apparently my skipping and hopping skills were superior, but my galloping skills were only above average. (I'm not making this up.) My Body I.D. (I don't have any idea what that is... I could pick my own body out of a line-up?) was superior, but my ability to crab-walk was only above average. My lowest scores were that I was only average in two-handed catching (that hasn't changed much in the last two decades) and average in hook lying position. Um, what? Hook lying position?? Frankly, I'm surprised that I was even average. I don't think I could get into a "hook lying position" right now if my life depended on it, mostly because I don't have a clue what that is.

After I failed to find my IQ score in the filing cabinet, I called my dad (who is a super-genius but not a member of Mensa) to see if he remembered my IQ score. He said he doesn't recall them ever telling him my score, just the percentile I was in (Mensa needs the actual score.) He then asked me why on Earth I would want to join Mensa, because it seemed to him that it was just a group of people who liked to talk about being smart. I told him that Elle and I wanted to meet new people, and he said we should join a historical society or another group that actually does something useful.

I never did find my IQ test results, and since I'm cheap and lazy, I can pretty much guarantee that I will never be a member of Mensa. Plus, I'm a bit scared that part of the Mensa test would be to get into a hook lying position, and I'd fail, and all of the smart people would laugh at me.

13 comments:

Former Fat Chick said...

the word MENSA cracks me up...in Spanish it means DUMMY, actually FEMALE DUMMY, Menso is male dummy- ha-ha guess I am not Mensa bound

Moi said...

I feel dumb as I don't know what Mensa is and clearly it is for smart people so maybe nobody thought I would need to know...hee hee

Hmmm..I am with your Dad.
"hook lying position"? What?

SkylersDad said...

(Sinatra voice...) I've got pieces of Mensa people in my stool!

B.E. Earl said...

There are free IQ tests all over the internets if you are really interested.

Tova Darling said...

FFC - Hahaha! That is fantastic! I guess the Mensa people weren't smart enough to figure that out!

Moi - You've probably never heard of it because nobody ever wants to talk about it for fear of seeming pretentious! I'm very sure that you're not dumb. :)

SkylersDad - Now I feel dumb. I don't get it!

B.E. Earl - I know, but Mensa doesn't accept those scores. It has to be an accredited test. Unless it means eating free appetizers at a local restaurant (which is apparently what the Mensa in my area pays for its members to go out and do together), I don't particularly care what my IQ is. :)

Joanie M said...

My ex-brother-in-law is or was a member of Mensa. He is a complete geek, and so is his wife. Although I did find them on AOL, looking for swingers or at least someone to do a 3-way with them! I never did find out if it was for real or not.

Autumn said...

Lol. The idea of taking the IQ test is what scares me. I like to think I am smart by my own standards, I am scared to death that a real test (that I was foolish enough to pay for) would tell me that I am not as smart as I like to think I am. I do the online ones (the easy and free ones that ask the dumbest questions) only when friends take them first and then bug me to take it... but I never publish my scores to anyone but those who have already taken said quizes.
(Ok honestly even admiting that makes me feel less smart somehow.) Lol.

Marie said...

There's also a large (ok so so) membership fee once you do past the iq tests (or they can look at your SATs, Lsats, military placement tests ect).

I have the same view as FFC... if I mention Mensa ppl either have no clue what it is or they think I'm calling them or myself stupid :D

dextershaven said...

AA meetings are free, and you can meet lots of interesting people there, without an IQ test.

PS. You have no idea who I am, and I can't remember how I got here.

Jules said...

I considered it too, but I was afraid that it would be group of people who spend way too much time trying to out-intelligence each other. And that they would rope me into participating in a bake sale or some other fundraiser like that!

ps
Am catching up on my blog-reading after a busy weekend babysitting my one-year-old nephew (glad to be done with that phase) and would like to add that, regarding keeping spice in the marriage, don't let dust collect on your stripper pole and you will be in great shape!!

Carla said...

We actually don't sit around talking about how smart we are. Mostly we drink and play games.

Mensa has people of all types, much like any other large organization. There are jocks, artists, geeks- literally all kinds. Mensa is great for networking too.

Anyway if you're seriously interested, check out one of the events in your area.

J&D said...

 

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Autumn said...

Um.....can someone translate that please??

In my opinion, we don't devote nearly enough scientific research to finding a cure for jerks. ~ Calvin & Hobbes